SHOT OF NEWSREADER ‘FOXY’ AND BESIDE HER IS A MONITOR WITH A SMILING ‘MAHMOUD AHMADINEJAD’
FOXY
Iran President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad told a packed Hollywood Hugo
Chavez Roast last night he was so moved by not being able to visit the
9/11 site he is going to produce a factual Hollywood movie based on the
incident. He told the cheering crowd he has already signed on Kevin
Spacey to play himself and Sean Penn and Rosie will be hammering out
his Oscar acceptance speech and screenplay tomorrow. ,, Well Mahmoud, that’s a surprise producing a Hollywood movie.
MAHMOUD
Yes well my good friend and fellow dictator Hugo Chavez convinced me if
we can make good movies with top Hollywood actors we can drive the Jews
and gays out of Hollywood and win their Oscars and take over the western world.
FOXY
Wow, those are big plans!
MAHMOUD
Yes I plan to be the world’s next Rupert Murdoch, except, I don’t talk
funny like him, or, have a funny gay name like , haha, RUPERT.
‘MAHMOUD’ LAUGHS CRAZY AND MONITOR CHANGES TO A SMILING ‘O.J. SIMPSON’.
FOXY
A cheerful O.J. Simpson announced on Larry King last night that his
Vegas arrest was just a harmless acting stunt that went wrong as he
and his friendly gang of hoods were just improvising a scene from
Quentin Tarantino’s new black comedy, a remake of the Vegas Rat
Pack movie,’ Robin and the 7 Hoods’. O.J. then slammed Quentin for
dropping him from the movie after his arrest and hiring Robert Blake
to play Sinatra saying Quentin was now turning the black comedy into
a complete farce and he hoped it would die a slow horrible painful death
at the box office. ,,, Wow O.J., I didn’t know you were getting back into
acting again.
O.J.
Oh ya Foxy I love acting, I’m hoping once producers see me in my
next court appearance they will remember what a great actor I really
am and offer me some juicy roles.
FOXY
Yes, I could see you making a great Robert Blake, or even a Phil Spector.
O.J. ( angry )
Robert Blake, Damn, I would KILL for that role! ( LOOKS EVIL )
MONITOR CHANGES TO A SMILING ‘PHIL SPECTOR’ WEARING DISCO CLOTHES.
FOXY
Phil Spector also appeared on Larry King last night to tell him now
he is going to get off killing that has been actress what’s her name, he’s
keen to get back into producing music again and has already been hired
by Britney Spears to produce her next comeback album, tentively titled,
‘Jailhouse Disco’. Phil claimed with modern recording tricks and
unnamed singers he could make Britney sound groovy and was already
writing out his and Britney’s acceptance speeches for next years M.T.V.
Awards and Superbowl appearance. ,,, Gee Phil it’s been a long time
between songs, what made you want to get back into music?
PHIL
Money Foxy money, Disco Phil has been taken to the cleaners by rip off
lawers Foxy, Disco Phil is broker than a broke door nail, lucky Disco Phil
now has a very cheap lawyer who won’t rip him off.
FOXY
Really, so who is your lawyer now?
PHIL
Debra Opri Foxy, and not only is she Disco lawyer but tonight she is going to be Disco lover, oh yaaa, cause Disco Phil is cocked, loaded, and ready to shoot for the ladies again, oh yaaa Debraaaaaaa, open wide baby.
‘PHIL’ SMILES AND LAUGHS CRAZY AND MONITOR TURNS OFF.
FOXY
I would hate to see the custody battle over their lovechild.,, And that’s
today’s headlines and now it’s time for ‘Foxx n Friends’.
SHOT OF ‘FOXX N FRIENDS’ SET WITH HOST ‘REDD FOXX’ AND SEATED ARE ‘PHIL SPECTOR’, ‘O.J. SIMPSON’, AND ‘MAHMOUD AHMADADIJED’ LOOKING LIKE A HOLLWOOD PRODUCER WITH GOLD RINGS AND CHAINS.
REDD
Thanks Foxy, and today we got a real killer panel for ya all,
PHIL
Hey Redd, Disco Phil is no killer, the jury is still out on that verdict dude,
so Disco Phil is free to rock the ladies again, oh yaaaaa
‘PHIL’ STANDS UP AND DOES A THRUST WHICH SHOWS HE HAS A GUN IN HIS POCKET. WE HEAR A FEW WOMEN SCREAM AND RUN OUT.
O.J.
Ya I sure ain’t no killer Redd, I’m a highly trusted sports memorabilia
dealer, honest.
HEAR AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND DOG BARKS. ‘O.J.’ SNARLS AT THEM AND SHOWS A KNIFE, THEY SHUT UP FAST.
MAHMOUD
Well I’m not really a killer either, I get my servants to do that and I just
accept all their glory and rewards. ( GRINS SHOWING OFF GOLD
TEETH AND RINGS )
HEAR LOTS OF ANGRY AUDIENCE DOG BARKS.
REDD
Damn, we got a RUFF crowd in today. ( GRINS )
MAHMOUD
Yes what are these dogs doing here, dogs are dirty and disgusting, they
should be rounded up and sent to Michael Vick and DMX to make
cat food!
HEAR DOG BARKS AND GROWLS.
REDD
Careful Mahmoud, I can foresee some RUFF justice coming your way.
( GRINS )
HEAR AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND BARKS AND SUDDENLY 12 ANGRY DOGS RUSH THE STAGE AND CUT AN INCH BEFORE THEY BITE INTO ‘PHIL’S,’O.J.’S, AND THE GUY WITH THE BIG NAME’S NAUGHTY BITS.
Friday, September 28, 2007
Monday, September 17, 2007
Not the Fox News Dog Comedy Show 2
SHOT OF NEWSREADER ‘FOXY’ AND ON MONITOR BESIDE HER IS ‘ KATHY GRIFFIN’ IN A CLOUD OF SMOKE.
FOXY
A somber Kathy Griffin appeared on Larry King last night to apologize
personally and profusely to the grieving Reverends Al Sharpton and
Jesse Jackson for not thanking Jesus when she won her Creative Arts
Reality Emmy. She then blamed her blasphemy on visiting the Weeds
entourage and then got down on her knees and thanked Jesus for her
Creative Arts Reality Emmy and promised him if she ever wins a real
Emmy she might even go to church to thank him personally, if she isn’t
too hung over that day.,,,Wow Kathy, so you’ve found religion now?
KATHY
Ya Foxy thanks to Paris Hilton, when her Simple Life didn’t win my
reality Emmy she threw her Bible at me, thank God she saved me,
Paris is an angel, she’s Hollywood’s own Mother Teresa, I love her
and Jesus.
FOXY
Ah Kathy, you haven’t been visiting the Weeds entourage again have
you?
KATHY
God no Foxy,,,um,, what was the question again?
MONITOR CHANGES TO A WAIST UP SHOT OF BIKINI CLAD ‘ BRITNEY SPEARS’ HOLDING A BOTTLE OF ‘DRY WHITE WHINE’.
FOXY
A tearful Britney Spears also appeared on Larry King last night
in a very revealing one piece bikini to tell Larry she has now
cancelled her singing comeback and then cheerfully announced
she will be hosting next weeks Saturday Night Live, dancing and lip
syncing to some raunchy new Sarah Silverman routines. She said the
producer and Sarah were so impressed with her funny routine on the
MTV Awards show they assured her she will be the next Rosanne of
comedy and she is already in talks to sing the national anthem at
Wrigley Field and to star in her own Fox sitcom.,,, Wow Britney, a
Fox sitcom, go girl!
BRITNEY
Ya thanks Foxy, I always knew my future would be in comedy, I’ve
been working hard on it for the last year now.
FOXY
Oh, so that explains all your funny behavior?
BRITNEY
Ya Foxy you can thank Sarah Silverman for that, she wrote it all for me.
FOXY
What, she wrote you into rehab?
BRITNEY
Ya the bitch, I didn’t think that was very funny, I hated Promises, if it
wasn’t for the night time escapes I would have dried up in there and
I’m wayyyyy too young to dry up.
‘BRITNEY’ SMILES AND STARTS SCULLING BOTTLE OF WINE. MONITOR CHANGES TO A HAZY ‘OSAMA BIN LADEN’.
FOXY
Osama Bin Laden released another strange video last night this time
admitting to using the last bottle of Saddam Hussein’s Grecian Hair
Darkener to try to appeal to a young Hollywood crowd like a hip funny
Dennis Miller, except way way darker. He then denounced all western
media for implying his speeches were being written by American Al
Qaeda funnyman Adam Gadhan and then went on and promised if he
takes over the world he will guarantee to bring back the N.F.L to Los
Angeles and make Sean Penn the dictator with Rosie as his loving wife.,,,
Wow Osama, those are some promises.
OSAMA ( American accent )
Oh ya Foxy it’s a joke L.A. doesn’t have an N.F.L. team when hell holes
like Cleveland have one, where’s the justice in that man, no wonder
David Beckham is so God damned popular there, Al Qaeda hates Posh
and Becks!
FOXY
Hey wait a minute you’re not Osama, you’re Adam Gadhan.
OSAMA ( worried )
,,, No I’m not.
FOXY
Well explain your American accent, ADAM?
OSAMA
,,, D’oh !
MONITOR TURNS OFF.
FOXY
And that’s today’s headlines and now it’s time, for ‘Foxx n Friends’.
SHOT TO ‘FOXX N FRIENDS’ SET WITH HOST ‘REDD FOXX’ AND SEATED ARE ‘BRITNEY SPEARS’ WEARING BIKINI AND CLUTCHING A BOTTLE OF ‘DRY WHITE WHINE’, ‘KATHY GRIFFEN’ CLUTCHING A BIBLE AND HER EMMY, ‘ADAM OSAMA GADHAN’ AND TWO EMPTY SEATS.
REDD
Thanks Foxy, and today we got a bit of a funny crazy panel for ya all,
ADAM
Hey Redd I’m not crazy, just cause I look like Osama and talk like
Obama it doesn’t make me crazy man.
HEAR AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND DOG BARKS, ‘ADAM’ GLARES AND REVEALS HE IS WEARING A BOMB, AUDIENCE SHUTS UP FAST.
KATHY
Well I’m sure not crazy Redd, crazy people don’t win a God damned Creative Arts Reality Emmy do they, thank you baby Jesus and Paris,
I love you guys.
HOLDS UP EMMY AND BIBLE TO AUDIENCE APPLAUSE AND DOG BARKS.
BRITNEY
And I’m not really crazy, I just act funny for my comedy act, duh.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND DOG BARKS, ‘BRITNEY’ LOOKS PERPELEXED AND THEN STARTS SCULLING BOTTLE OF WINE.
REDD
O.K., I stand corrected, today we got a crazy funny panel of liars for ya
all. ( GRINS )
AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND DOG BARKS AS ‘O.J. SIMPSON’ WEARING A PRISON UNIFORM RUSHES IN TO HIS SEAT.
O.J.
Sorry I’m late Redd, got held up in Vegas.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND DOG BARKS AND ‘O.J.’ SNARLS AT THEM AND SHOWS THEM A KNIFE, THEY SHUT UP FAST. ‘ADAM’ STANDS UP .
ADAM
That’s it, all you American funny liars must die!
BOMB GOES OFF AND ‘ADAM’ EXPLODES.
REDD
Well, I can sure see why his comedy act bombed. ( GRINS )
HEAR AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND DOG BARKS AS ‘SENATOR LARRY CRAIG’ WEARING A DRESS SKIPS IN TO TAKE HIS SEAT AND CUT JUST AS HE TRIPS.
FOXY
A somber Kathy Griffin appeared on Larry King last night to apologize
personally and profusely to the grieving Reverends Al Sharpton and
Jesse Jackson for not thanking Jesus when she won her Creative Arts
Reality Emmy. She then blamed her blasphemy on visiting the Weeds
entourage and then got down on her knees and thanked Jesus for her
Creative Arts Reality Emmy and promised him if she ever wins a real
Emmy she might even go to church to thank him personally, if she isn’t
too hung over that day.,,,Wow Kathy, so you’ve found religion now?
KATHY
Ya Foxy thanks to Paris Hilton, when her Simple Life didn’t win my
reality Emmy she threw her Bible at me, thank God she saved me,
Paris is an angel, she’s Hollywood’s own Mother Teresa, I love her
and Jesus.
FOXY
Ah Kathy, you haven’t been visiting the Weeds entourage again have
you?
KATHY
God no Foxy,,,um,, what was the question again?
MONITOR CHANGES TO A WAIST UP SHOT OF BIKINI CLAD ‘ BRITNEY SPEARS’ HOLDING A BOTTLE OF ‘DRY WHITE WHINE’.
FOXY
A tearful Britney Spears also appeared on Larry King last night
in a very revealing one piece bikini to tell Larry she has now
cancelled her singing comeback and then cheerfully announced
she will be hosting next weeks Saturday Night Live, dancing and lip
syncing to some raunchy new Sarah Silverman routines. She said the
producer and Sarah were so impressed with her funny routine on the
MTV Awards show they assured her she will be the next Rosanne of
comedy and she is already in talks to sing the national anthem at
Wrigley Field and to star in her own Fox sitcom.,,, Wow Britney, a
Fox sitcom, go girl!
BRITNEY
Ya thanks Foxy, I always knew my future would be in comedy, I’ve
been working hard on it for the last year now.
FOXY
Oh, so that explains all your funny behavior?
BRITNEY
Ya Foxy you can thank Sarah Silverman for that, she wrote it all for me.
FOXY
What, she wrote you into rehab?
BRITNEY
Ya the bitch, I didn’t think that was very funny, I hated Promises, if it
wasn’t for the night time escapes I would have dried up in there and
I’m wayyyyy too young to dry up.
‘BRITNEY’ SMILES AND STARTS SCULLING BOTTLE OF WINE. MONITOR CHANGES TO A HAZY ‘OSAMA BIN LADEN’.
FOXY
Osama Bin Laden released another strange video last night this time
admitting to using the last bottle of Saddam Hussein’s Grecian Hair
Darkener to try to appeal to a young Hollywood crowd like a hip funny
Dennis Miller, except way way darker. He then denounced all western
media for implying his speeches were being written by American Al
Qaeda funnyman Adam Gadhan and then went on and promised if he
takes over the world he will guarantee to bring back the N.F.L to Los
Angeles and make Sean Penn the dictator with Rosie as his loving wife.,,,
Wow Osama, those are some promises.
OSAMA ( American accent )
Oh ya Foxy it’s a joke L.A. doesn’t have an N.F.L. team when hell holes
like Cleveland have one, where’s the justice in that man, no wonder
David Beckham is so God damned popular there, Al Qaeda hates Posh
and Becks!
FOXY
Hey wait a minute you’re not Osama, you’re Adam Gadhan.
OSAMA ( worried )
,,, No I’m not.
FOXY
Well explain your American accent, ADAM?
OSAMA
,,, D’oh !
MONITOR TURNS OFF.
FOXY
And that’s today’s headlines and now it’s time, for ‘Foxx n Friends’.
SHOT TO ‘FOXX N FRIENDS’ SET WITH HOST ‘REDD FOXX’ AND SEATED ARE ‘BRITNEY SPEARS’ WEARING BIKINI AND CLUTCHING A BOTTLE OF ‘DRY WHITE WHINE’, ‘KATHY GRIFFEN’ CLUTCHING A BIBLE AND HER EMMY, ‘ADAM OSAMA GADHAN’ AND TWO EMPTY SEATS.
REDD
Thanks Foxy, and today we got a bit of a funny crazy panel for ya all,
ADAM
Hey Redd I’m not crazy, just cause I look like Osama and talk like
Obama it doesn’t make me crazy man.
HEAR AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND DOG BARKS, ‘ADAM’ GLARES AND REVEALS HE IS WEARING A BOMB, AUDIENCE SHUTS UP FAST.
KATHY
Well I’m sure not crazy Redd, crazy people don’t win a God damned Creative Arts Reality Emmy do they, thank you baby Jesus and Paris,
I love you guys.
HOLDS UP EMMY AND BIBLE TO AUDIENCE APPLAUSE AND DOG BARKS.
BRITNEY
And I’m not really crazy, I just act funny for my comedy act, duh.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND DOG BARKS, ‘BRITNEY’ LOOKS PERPELEXED AND THEN STARTS SCULLING BOTTLE OF WINE.
REDD
O.K., I stand corrected, today we got a crazy funny panel of liars for ya
all. ( GRINS )
AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND DOG BARKS AS ‘O.J. SIMPSON’ WEARING A PRISON UNIFORM RUSHES IN TO HIS SEAT.
O.J.
Sorry I’m late Redd, got held up in Vegas.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND DOG BARKS AND ‘O.J.’ SNARLS AT THEM AND SHOWS THEM A KNIFE, THEY SHUT UP FAST. ‘ADAM’ STANDS UP .
ADAM
That’s it, all you American funny liars must die!
BOMB GOES OFF AND ‘ADAM’ EXPLODES.
REDD
Well, I can sure see why his comedy act bombed. ( GRINS )
HEAR AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND DOG BARKS AS ‘SENATOR LARRY CRAIG’ WEARING A DRESS SKIPS IN TO TAKE HIS SEAT AND CUT JUST AS HE TRIPS.
Thursday, September 6, 2007
Not the Fox News Dog Comedy Show
SHOT OF NEWSREADER ‘FOXY’ AND BESIDE HER IS A MONITOR WITH A SMILING ‘SENATOR LARRY CRAIG’ ON.
FOXY
Senator Larry Craig last night rang up Ryan Seacrest to confess to his
sins and now freely admits he was toe tapping in a Minnesota men’s
restroom,to Broadway tunes on his Ipod. He said he has now whacked
all the gay music off his hard drive and has hired Michael Vick’s lawyer
to convince his Republican Senators to forgive him for toe tapping to
Barbra and to warmly welcome him back into the Senate with open arms,
in a very manly way off coarse.,, Wow Larry, why didn’t you just admit
you were toe tapping to Barbra in the first place ?
LARRY
I didn’t want the officer to think I was gay Foxy, can you imagine what
that would do to my conservative Republican reputation ?
FOXY
Yes, I imagine it would send it to the dogs.
‘LARRY’ GROWLS AND MONITOR CHANGES TO ‘HOWARD K. STERN’.
FOXY
Howard K. Stern also rang Ryan last night to tell him Rita Cosby’s
book claim that he and Larry had taped homosexual liaisons for Anna
Nicole’s pleasure was a slanderous vicious lie, not that there was
anything wrong with that. He swore to Ryan he wasn’t a toe tapper like
Larry and didn’t even like Broadway tunes or gay policemen and has now
hired Larry’s lawyer to sue the pants off that Cosby bitch. ,,,, Gee
Howard, hiring Larry’s lawyer sounds an incriminating move.
HOWARD
Why is that Foxy, if he is good enough for Michael Vick and Larry,
well then he is good enough for me. ( CHEESY SMILE )
FOXY
Yes but you’re a lawyer Howard, why not just hire yourself?
HOWARD
Are you joking Foxy, I’m way too expensive, I’m the shyster who
taught Debra Opri how to charge.
FOXY
Oh so you got her to screw Larry?
HOWARD
Well legally speaking yes, though, Larry much prefers getting
screwed by sexy male lawyers wink wink nudge nudge.
FOXY
Say no more Howard, say no more.
HOWARD
,, D’oh !
MONITOR CHANGES TO LAWYER ‘BILLY MARTIN’ HOLDING RICH DOG ‘TROUBLE’.
FOXY
Celebrity dog lawyer Billy Martin announced on Animal Court last
night he is now also representing Leona Helmsley’s 12 million dollar
dog Trouble in numerous lawsuits from former bitten staff and
grandchildren. He says thanks to Michael Vick he is now the hottest
dog lawyer around and welcomed any other offers from rich dogs to
hire him to get some RUFF justice. ,,,, Wow Billy, you sure must be
busy with all these new clients.
BILLY
Hell ya Foxy I been working like a dog, I just had to turn down O.J.,
D.M.X., and R. Kelly, I’ve got enough mongrels on my books already.
FOXY
So do you think you can win your dog cases ?
BILLY
Hell no Foxy, but I don’t tell them that, those mongrels bite!
‘BILLY’ LAUGHS CRAZY AND ‘TROUBLE’ BITES HIS GOLD FINGERED HAND TO A BIG “OUCH”. MONITOR TURNS OFF.
FOXY
Looks like Trouble has expensive taste ( SMILES )., And that’s today’s headlines
and now it’s time, for ‘Foxx n Friends’.
SHOT TO ‘FOXX N FRIENDS’ SET WITH HOST ‘REDD FOXX’ AND GUESTS ‘LARRY CRAIG’, ‘HOWARD K. STERN’ AND ‘BILLY MARTIN’ WITH BANDAGED HAND HOLDING ‘TROUBLE'.
REDD
Thanks Foxy, and today being International Animal Day we got a
panel of dogs for ya all,
BILLY
Hey I ain’t no dog Redd, I just represent the mongrels!
AUDIENCE DOG BARKS THEN ‘TROUBLE’ BITES HIS HAND TO AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND DOG BARKS.
BILLY
OUCH, that’s it Trouble, I’m hiring myself to sue you bitch !
‘TROUBLE’ BITES HAND AGAIN TO MORE AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND DOG BARKS. ‘TROUBLE’ ESCAPES.
LARRY
Well I’m sure not a dog, I’m a very conservative god fearing Republican,
Democrats are the dogs.
HEAR AUDIENCE DOG BARKS, ‘LARRY’ SCOWLS AND GIVES THEM THE FINGER.
HOWARD
Well I’m certainly not a dog, I’m a highly trusted respected lawyer, honest.
HEAR AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND DOG BARKS, ‘HOWARD’ SCOWLS AT THEM.
REDD
Hell, am I the only one man enough to admit I’m a dog, you guys are
pussies, Ruff Ruff Ruff !!!
PANEL ARCH THEIR BACKS AND HISS LIKE CATS AT ‘REDD’.
REDD
CAT FIGHT !!!
HUGE AUDIENCE CHEERS AND DOG BARKS AND SUDDENLY 12 ANGRY AUDIENCE DOGS RUSH THE STAGE AND CUT AN INCH BEFORE THEY BITE INTO ‘LARRY, MOE AND CURLY’S ‘ NAUGHTY BITS.
FOXY
Senator Larry Craig last night rang up Ryan Seacrest to confess to his
sins and now freely admits he was toe tapping in a Minnesota men’s
restroom,to Broadway tunes on his Ipod. He said he has now whacked
all the gay music off his hard drive and has hired Michael Vick’s lawyer
to convince his Republican Senators to forgive him for toe tapping to
Barbra and to warmly welcome him back into the Senate with open arms,
in a very manly way off coarse.,, Wow Larry, why didn’t you just admit
you were toe tapping to Barbra in the first place ?
LARRY
I didn’t want the officer to think I was gay Foxy, can you imagine what
that would do to my conservative Republican reputation ?
FOXY
Yes, I imagine it would send it to the dogs.
‘LARRY’ GROWLS AND MONITOR CHANGES TO ‘HOWARD K. STERN’.
FOXY
Howard K. Stern also rang Ryan last night to tell him Rita Cosby’s
book claim that he and Larry had taped homosexual liaisons for Anna
Nicole’s pleasure was a slanderous vicious lie, not that there was
anything wrong with that. He swore to Ryan he wasn’t a toe tapper like
Larry and didn’t even like Broadway tunes or gay policemen and has now
hired Larry’s lawyer to sue the pants off that Cosby bitch. ,,,, Gee
Howard, hiring Larry’s lawyer sounds an incriminating move.
HOWARD
Why is that Foxy, if he is good enough for Michael Vick and Larry,
well then he is good enough for me. ( CHEESY SMILE )
FOXY
Yes but you’re a lawyer Howard, why not just hire yourself?
HOWARD
Are you joking Foxy, I’m way too expensive, I’m the shyster who
taught Debra Opri how to charge.
FOXY
Oh so you got her to screw Larry?
HOWARD
Well legally speaking yes, though, Larry much prefers getting
screwed by sexy male lawyers wink wink nudge nudge.
FOXY
Say no more Howard, say no more.
HOWARD
,, D’oh !
MONITOR CHANGES TO LAWYER ‘BILLY MARTIN’ HOLDING RICH DOG ‘TROUBLE’.
FOXY
Celebrity dog lawyer Billy Martin announced on Animal Court last
night he is now also representing Leona Helmsley’s 12 million dollar
dog Trouble in numerous lawsuits from former bitten staff and
grandchildren. He says thanks to Michael Vick he is now the hottest
dog lawyer around and welcomed any other offers from rich dogs to
hire him to get some RUFF justice. ,,,, Wow Billy, you sure must be
busy with all these new clients.
BILLY
Hell ya Foxy I been working like a dog, I just had to turn down O.J.,
D.M.X., and R. Kelly, I’ve got enough mongrels on my books already.
FOXY
So do you think you can win your dog cases ?
BILLY
Hell no Foxy, but I don’t tell them that, those mongrels bite!
‘BILLY’ LAUGHS CRAZY AND ‘TROUBLE’ BITES HIS GOLD FINGERED HAND TO A BIG “OUCH”. MONITOR TURNS OFF.
FOXY
Looks like Trouble has expensive taste ( SMILES )., And that’s today’s headlines
and now it’s time, for ‘Foxx n Friends’.
SHOT TO ‘FOXX N FRIENDS’ SET WITH HOST ‘REDD FOXX’ AND GUESTS ‘LARRY CRAIG’, ‘HOWARD K. STERN’ AND ‘BILLY MARTIN’ WITH BANDAGED HAND HOLDING ‘TROUBLE'.
REDD
Thanks Foxy, and today being International Animal Day we got a
panel of dogs for ya all,
BILLY
Hey I ain’t no dog Redd, I just represent the mongrels!
AUDIENCE DOG BARKS THEN ‘TROUBLE’ BITES HIS HAND TO AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND DOG BARKS.
BILLY
OUCH, that’s it Trouble, I’m hiring myself to sue you bitch !
‘TROUBLE’ BITES HAND AGAIN TO MORE AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND DOG BARKS. ‘TROUBLE’ ESCAPES.
LARRY
Well I’m sure not a dog, I’m a very conservative god fearing Republican,
Democrats are the dogs.
HEAR AUDIENCE DOG BARKS, ‘LARRY’ SCOWLS AND GIVES THEM THE FINGER.
HOWARD
Well I’m certainly not a dog, I’m a highly trusted respected lawyer, honest.
HEAR AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND DOG BARKS, ‘HOWARD’ SCOWLS AT THEM.
REDD
Hell, am I the only one man enough to admit I’m a dog, you guys are
pussies, Ruff Ruff Ruff !!!
PANEL ARCH THEIR BACKS AND HISS LIKE CATS AT ‘REDD’.
REDD
CAT FIGHT !!!
HUGE AUDIENCE CHEERS AND DOG BARKS AND SUDDENLY 12 ANGRY AUDIENCE DOGS RUSH THE STAGE AND CUT AN INCH BEFORE THEY BITE INTO ‘LARRY, MOE AND CURLY’S ‘ NAUGHTY BITS.
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