Not the Fox News Dog Comedy Show

SHOT OF NEWSREADER ‘FOXY’ AND BESIDE HER IS A MONITOR WITH A SMILING ‘SENATOR LARRY CRAIG’ ON.

FOXY
Senator Larry Craig last night rang up Ryan Seacrest to confess to his
sins and now freely admits he was toe tapping in a Minnesota men’s
restroom,to Broadway tunes on his Ipod. He said he has now whacked
all the gay music off his hard drive and has hired Michael Vick’s lawyer
to convince his Republican Senators to forgive him for toe tapping to
Barbra and to warmly welcome him back into the Senate with open arms,
in a very manly way off coarse.,, Wow Larry, why didn’t you just admit
you were toe tapping to Barbra in the first place ?

LARRY
I didn’t want the officer to think I was gay Foxy, can you imagine what
that would do to my conservative Republican reputation ?

FOXY
Yes, I imagine it would send it to the dogs.

‘LARRY’ GROWLS AND MONITOR CHANGES TO ‘HOWARD K. STERN’.

FOXY
Howard K. Stern also rang Ryan last night to tell him Rita Cosby’s
book claim that he and Larry had taped homosexual liaisons for Anna
Nicole’s pleasure was a slanderous vicious lie, not that there was
anything wrong with that. He swore to Ryan he wasn’t a toe tapper like
Larry and didn’t even like Broadway tunes or gay policemen and has now
hired Larry’s lawyer to sue the pants off that Cosby bitch. ,,,, Gee
Howard, hiring Larry’s lawyer sounds an incriminating move.

HOWARD
Why is that Foxy, if he is good enough for Michael Vick and Larry,
well then he is good enough for me. ( CHEESY SMILE )

FOXY
Yes but you’re a lawyer Howard, why not just hire yourself?

HOWARD
Are you joking Foxy, I’m way too expensive, I’m the shyster who
taught Debra Opri how to charge.

FOXY
Oh so you got her to screw Larry?

HOWARD
Well legally speaking yes, though, Larry much prefers getting
screwed by sexy male lawyers wink wink nudge nudge.

FOXY
Say no more Howard, say no more.

HOWARD
,, D’oh !

MONITOR CHANGES TO LAWYER ‘BILLY MARTIN’ HOLDING RICH DOG ‘TROUBLE’.

FOXY
Celebrity dog lawyer Billy Martin announced on Animal Court last
night he is now also representing Leona Helmsley’s 12 million dollar
dog Trouble in numerous lawsuits from former bitten staff and
grandchildren. He says thanks to Michael Vick he is now the hottest
dog lawyer around and welcomed any other offers from rich dogs to
hire him to get some RUFF justice. ,,,, Wow Billy, you sure must be
busy with all these new clients.

BILLY
Hell ya Foxy I been working like a dog, I just had to turn down O.J.,
D.M.X., and R. Kelly, I’ve got enough mongrels on my books already.

FOXY
So do you think you can win your dog cases ?

BILLY
Hell no Foxy, but I don’t tell them that, those mongrels bite!

‘BILLY’ LAUGHS CRAZY AND ‘TROUBLE’ BITES HIS GOLD FINGERED HAND TO A BIG “OUCH”. MONITOR TURNS OFF.

FOXY
Looks like Trouble has expensive taste ( SMILES )., And that’s today’s headlines
and now it’s time, for ‘Foxx n Friends’.

SHOT TO ‘FOXX N FRIENDS’ SET WITH HOST ‘REDD FOXX’ AND GUESTS ‘LARRY CRAIG’, ‘HOWARD K. STERN’ AND ‘BILLY MARTIN’ WITH BANDAGED HAND HOLDING ‘TROUBLE'.

REDD
Thanks Foxy, and today being International Animal Day we got a
panel of dogs for ya all,

BILLY
Hey I ain’t no dog Redd, I just represent the mongrels!

AUDIENCE DOG BARKS THEN ‘TROUBLE’ BITES HIS HAND TO AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND DOG BARKS.

BILLY
OUCH, that’s it Trouble, I’m hiring myself to sue you bitch !

‘TROUBLE’ BITES HAND AGAIN TO MORE AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND DOG BARKS. ‘TROUBLE’ ESCAPES.

LARRY
Well I’m sure not a dog, I’m a very conservative god fearing Republican,
Democrats are the dogs.

HEAR AUDIENCE DOG BARKS, ‘LARRY’ SCOWLS AND GIVES THEM THE FINGER.

HOWARD
Well I’m certainly not a dog, I’m a highly trusted respected lawyer, honest.

HEAR AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND DOG BARKS, ‘HOWARD’ SCOWLS AT THEM.

REDD
Hell, am I the only one man enough to admit I’m a dog, you guys are
pussies, Ruff Ruff Ruff !!!

PANEL ARCH THEIR BACKS AND HISS LIKE CATS AT ‘REDD’.

REDD
CAT FIGHT !!!

HUGE AUDIENCE CHEERS AND DOG BARKS AND SUDDENLY 12 ANGRY AUDIENCE DOGS RUSH THE STAGE AND CUT AN INCH BEFORE THEY BITE INTO ‘LARRY, MOE AND CURLY’S ‘ NAUGHTY BITS.