Not the Redd Foxx Show

NOT THE REDD FOXX SHOW

( think cheap animation that flows fast ) SHOT OF NEWSREADER ‘FOXY BIMBO’ AND ON MONITOR BEHIND HER IS ‘NICK NOLTE’ MUGSHOT .

FOXY
After reading an excerpt from Anna Nicole’s diary Fox head Rupert Murdoch
has paid a whopping two million dollars for the literary gem saying it was a
bloody bargain as it was written so good it will go down in history as America’s own ‘Diary of Anne Frank’, except, it was heaps better as there was way more sex and drugs in it. He also said Fox TV will be making a bloody good miniseries on the diaries starring Britney Spears as Anna Nicole, Zsa Zsa’s hubby Prince as the creepy old guy, and Nick Nolte as the sleazy shyster. Production is due to start once everybody sobers up.

NICK
Hell ! I didn’t see that sober up clause, I’m out of here !


‘NICK’ RUNS OFF REVEALING BEHIND HIM A DOOR WITH SIGN

‘Howard K. Stern’s
Shyster Acting Academy’

MONITOR PICTURE TURNS TO A PICTURE OF ‘STEVEN SPIELBERG’ WITH ‘JAWS’ BASEBALL CAP.

FOXY
Steven Spielberg today admitted it was actually him and David Geffen that
made the satirical Hillary clip on U-Tube and not the Obama p.r. team. He
blamed it on him and David inhaling too much at an Al Gore hot air fundraiser and now both have apologized to Hillary saying they had no idea so many people watched U-Tube and promised her from now on they will wear gas masks to all Al Gore hot air fundraisers.

STEVEN
Yes Foxy we are both very sorry for what we did as being true democrats we have no preferences at all who wins the leadership, other than we hope, and pray, the best man wins.

DAVID ( voice only)
Hey Steve I got a great idea, how about an animated Hillary Clinton, Nancy Pelosi, lesbian comedy sketch with Obama as the butler and our man Al as the sexy hunk man about the house, man, that’s going to be so funny haha.

STEVEN
Dave, you said you weren’t going to inhale anymore.

DAVID ( voice only )
Don’t believe anything I say, I’m worse than Clinton. ( EVIL LAUGH )

SMOKE BLOWS ONTO ‘STEVENS’ FACE. MONITOR PICTURE CHANGES TO ‘DAFFY DUCK’ WITH BIG BANDAGES ON BEAK.

FOXY
After Carol Burnett announced she is suing Fox TV for two million
dollars because their cartoon ‘Family Guy’ made dirty fun of her charwoman
character, a flock of out of work cartoon characters have hired top lawyer
Lionel Hutz to sue Fox T.V. for turning cartoons into a farce. A spokestoon
for the flock, Daffy Duck, said since Fox made ‘The Simpsons’ and the rest of those edgy cartoons, producers are just slamming the doors on our face and older toon characters are starving as contrary to belief,we were all ripped off by signing a non residual contract.

DAFFY
Ya Foxy it’s tough out there I tell ya, I’ve already had three bloody broken noses this week.

DOOR SLAMS AND SIGN ON DOOR READS

‘RUPERT FOX
CARTOON PRODUCER’ .

DAFFY ( voice only )
Yeouchhhhhh ! Make that four.

RUPERT ( voice only )
I told you, I hate bloody quacks ! ,,, and bloody Poofters !

DAFFY ( voice only )
Hey I’m not gay, I just walk funny.

MONITOR TURNS OFF.

FOXY
Well that today’s headlines and now back to ‘Foxx n Friends’.

SHOT OF THE ‘FOXX N FRIENDS’ SET WITH HOST ‘REDD FOXX’ AND SITTING IN CHAIRS ARE ‘CAROL BURNETT’ DRESSED AS CHARWOMAN, STEVEN SPEILBERG, ‘DAVID GEFFEN’ WEARING A BONG GASS MASK, ‘NICK NOLTE’ DRINKING FROM A PAPER BAG, AND ‘DAFFY DUCK’ WITH MORE BANDAGES ON BEAK.

REDD
Thanks Foxy, and

CAROL BURNETT ( interrupting )
Oh great I’m that stupid charwoman character again, I’m suing the dog
that wrote this crap.!

DAVID
Ya I agree this show stinks, I hope nobody recognizes me.

STEVEN
Don’t worry Dave, no one knows what you really look like anyways.

REDD
Dave, who the hell is Dave ?

DAVID
Dave’s not here man . ( EVIL LAUGH AS MASK FILLS WITH SMOKE )

NICK
Hey don’t worry Carol, I have some legal experience,, lift up your dress and show me your briefs,, or should I say,, show me your astronaut panties hahahaha

‘CAROL’ GETS UP AND WADDLES OVER TO ‘NICK’ WITH A MOP.

REDD
Ouch Nick that was a bit below the belt, hah ,, so Steven,, any new movie plans or anything coming up ?

STEVEN
Well funny you should ask Redd, as me and David are currently developing a Fox sitcom about two rich lesbians living with a wisecracking half black butler and a sexy hunk handy man. It should be hilarious.

REDD
Ya sounds a gas, any chance a role for me ?

STEVEN
Well,, I guess if you lightened up a bit, you could make a good butler.

REDD
Butler !! Hell no! I was thinking more sexy, hunk, lesbian, have you seen my
Flip Wilson impersonation ?

‘REDD’ STANDS UP AND RIPS OFF SUIT REVEALLING SHORT RED DRESS AND GOES TO DO HIS ‘GERALDINE’ IMPERSONATION, ‘CAROL’ HAS FINALLY REACHED ‘NICK’ AND STARTS MEAKLY HITTING HIM OVER THE HEAD WITH MOP.

DAFFY
All right enough is enough stop this sketch, this is even getting too daffy for me.

ALL CHARACTERS FREEZE AND ON WALKS ‘RUPERT MURDOCH’ TO A FEW DOG “BARKS” CARRYING THE ‘FAMILY GUY’ DOG ‘BRIAN’ AND CUT AN INCH BEFORE HE SMASHES ‘BRIAN’ OVER CAROL BURNETT’S HEAD.


Note- Monty can be sued by sending 10 American dollars and a postage return envelope to

Monty ( the bad dog )
Stewart Island,
New Zealand

Ps- kids don’t ask your parents first.